Third time our charm?

TTC update: We had our third (and hopefully last) IUI this morning; everything went wonderful. Our sperm count was 18million; which was wonderful for a donor purchase! That's the highest count we've had and are so excited! So far this cycle has had all good numbers! Hopefully my next two tests, P4 (6/1) and the Beta (6/8) will be perfect as well. This could be our month! The chance for a singleton with 5 follies/IUI are 50-60%; that's up from 10% with 1-2 follies.

"Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths". Romans 3:5-6

Weigh in: I lost 3.6 lbs. my first week!

Feeling beachy: 7 days left; aaaah....i.cannot.wait.

holy, cheese!

TTC update: Briefly, this cycle was Femara, cd3-7 and Repronex 150mg cd 8-10. I had the longest AF cycle ever after arriving 2 days late post Beta due to Prometrium. Even on cd8 I was still spotting. But the Femara hadn't been making my ovaries twinge and cramp like it had my first 2 cycles. And even with the Repronex, I hadn't felt hardly any cramping at all; I didn't think it was working. I had my cd10 scan today (cd 11 fell on Saturday so it was one day early) and I have 5 (F-I-V-E) follies! To date, I've only had puney follies and at the most, 2 (last month was maybe 3). I am SO happy. So, So, So - happy! (Thank you, Lord!) I will take injections tonight and tomorrow and trigger on Sunday. My IUI is scheduled for Tuesday morning. I feel really good about this cycle. My doctor was very happy.

Weight Watchers: I have had a perfect week back on WW. I am down already but will officially weigh-in on Sunday. I'm very proud of me and happy I've finally found the motivation to do this!

I want my toes in the water.....

Lovely Weekend: Jay and I had a lovely, lovely weekend. Let's start with Friday. His birthday is June 3 and we found a super, awesome last-minute vacation deal for Myrtle Beach. (we were hoping for a gulf-coast destination, but we'll take this!). We leave on the 2nd and return the 6th. There will be no plans other than my butt. in a chair. on the beach. for 5 days. Awesome news...my Beta will be the 7th; what an awesome birthday present this would be! Saturday, J treated me to a Seafood place in Pigeon Forge and we ended up in North Carolina. It was a rainy day but even the rain doesn't take away from the beauty of the mountains. It was a perfect day. Yesterday, we went to church, had lunch, went grocery shopping, went to the movies, cleaned 2 rooms, went to the book store and still had time to take a nap! It was the longest day ever but was wonderful! I picked up the book Crazy Love. I had heard so much about it; I can't wait to read more tonight.

TTC update: AF showed up last week on Wednesday, so I didn't have to wait too long after my (-) Beta. I ordered my injectables on Tuesday and they weren't supposed to arrive until this week, Wednesday at the latest. Although we wanted to go with an injectable only cycle, with the shots not guaranteed to arrive by cd3 and my RE office not having enough to get me through to this Wednesday (when shots were supposed to arrive) we decided we would go with a mixed cycle this month and if I didn't have at least 3 plump follies, we would skip the IUI this month and go for an injectable only cycle next month. So, I started Femara cd 3-7 and will do 2 Repronex injectables daily in the hip, cd 8-10. My scan is this Friday, 5/21 (I can't believe it's here so soon) and my IUI should be this weekend. Here's the funny thing, my injectables actually got here Friday day, but the Post Office didn't send an email with the Attempted Delivery Notification until like 8:30 Friday evening. I had my RE paged and she said it was too late to start the injectable cycle. Next, I ordered our donor fishies today (my donor was available) and I got 1/2 shipping....that made for a happy surprise, especially after last months ordeal. Femara hasn't made me all twingy and crampy like the first 2 cycles did; so I am kind of nervous about that. Is it working? Do I still have eggs down there? Is this month going to be a flop? Not totally stressing over it but it's there in the back of my mind...I hope it's doing what it's supposed to be doing.

Beach Bound: If going to the beach in 15 days doesn't kick my arse into gear, I don't know what would. Not only am I so motivated to loose whatever is (healthy) humanly possibly to loose in 15 days I am equally as disappointed that I let my weight get this high. I'm discusted. Those 2lbs here and 1lbs there, have added up and I am not happy at all. In addition to the C25K program I am (attempting) to do (it kicks major butt if your are the C part of that equation) I rejoined WW; actually the online program this time. I'm not expecting a huge loss between now and when we set sail to the ocean, but any loss is better than gaining and it will make me feel better knowing I am on the right path. I lost 40ish the first time around on WW (2005), kept it off for over 3 years and since, nothing has worked. I just have to remain motivated...that's where I fail everytime. Not this time.....

Off to catch-up on your blogs. Have a blessed week.

just when I thought...

this was my month to get a BFP; turns out Prometrium can increase your LP. My beta was this morning - the Dr. called around noon. Turns out, my 2nd BFN. Yes, still no AF. Apparantly, when increased from 100mg to 200mg daily, your LP can be affected....this I did not know. I was so convinced....even the slight cramps I had been having I thought was normal...at least everyone in Google land said so....I was sad but didn't cry. Maybe I knew deep down it wasn't going to be my month. But...I am ready to wipe away the sadness and move foward. My therapy this month will be aggressive. We are moving straight to injectables by passing the mix-therapy (of both Femara and Injectibles). I am very happy with this. I don't want to dilly-dally. I would rather spend the extra $ and see results vs. playing around with lesser therapies. But, until next my next ultrasound, my next lab, my next Beta....faith will lead my journey. This wasn't my month; I am completely content with that. I am in God's hands.

swim little fishies, swim!

Hi. Sadly, I am not writing from my cozy bed; duties called and I had to come into the office post-IUI. The last time I choose to lay down for hours afterwards; hopefully it doesn't really matter.

Hope everyone had a great weekend. I have a lot to catch-up on as I didn't get much online time; I can't wait to catch up on my reading and my sweet comments. Thank you all!

So, IUI went wonderful. I got there at 8:00 and after our fishies were thawed and washed, I got called back around 10:15. The count was 15 million. I was very happy - last donor was 14 million. I'm pretty sure I ovulated on time after triggering Saturday night. Note: I don't think we triggered in the right place the 1st cycle, because it didn't hurt. This cycle did. I pray this month is our BFP - because we move on to injectibles next month and a shot for 10-days straight in the rear doesn't excite me. i'm kind of a baby to pain. But gladly anything for a little baby. I am to start Progesterone suppositories tomorrow night, 100mg and my P4 test will be 5/3 @ 7:45a. My Beta will be 5/10 @ 7:45.

Please disregard the horrible hair day! Given the circumstances, these photo's of me aren't very good but are needed to document our journey.

Pre-IUI; awaiting RE

swim little fishies, swim!

this is during the procedure.

I have happily entered the 2 week wait. Fortunantly, I have learned patience; hopefully, that will pay off.

I really might have, what?

Happiest Friday, to you! I'm enjoying the beautiful blue skies before yucky storms set in over the weekend. If you don't know me in real life, I am petrified [yes, still at the age of 30] of storms. And being caught in a tornadic storm a few years ago, it's only made things worse. I guess I'm almost embarassed to admit this fear, but we all have ours. Just to say, this doesn't work well because my Jay loves storms. Go figure.

Today is cd15. I woke up early this morning to tinkle and noticed there was no twinging, cramping, zilch, nada - going on down there, especially following a rather active day. Could I have actually ovulated, on my own? I am not set to trigger until tomorrow but I feel nothing. When I was getting ready this morning, I still felt nothing. There was a bit of CM during my early morning potty trip, but none now. I called my RE first thing and requested an u/s to see if indeed, I did ovulate. They called and had me run over for a bloodtest for more accuracy. I should know the test results this afternoon. Should I be happy I [may have] actually O'd on my own or bummed that we might not get to do our IUI cycle? I will not borrow worry; I will update as soon as I get the call.

It saddens me that so many other couples have to experience the IF journey. I am so thankful that we have such a wonderful support system through blogging. All lovely comments give me so much hope and encouragement; so thank you.

Have a beautiful weekend. I can't wait to catch up on reading your blogs. Wishing all success in weekend IUI cycles and positive results to those waiting.

*update: I didn't O on my own....trigger is scheduled for tomorrow night with my IUI Monday morning.

 

I think I am ok with this.

First of all, welcome ICLW! This is my first month participating. I am so excited to have found such a fabulous support group; it means the world to me. I look forward to visiting your pages and getting to know more about everyone.

My cd13 ultrasound went ok this morning. I have more eggs than I have EVER had which I am happy with. In addition to a bunch of small eggs, there were; however, only 3 [could be] dominant.  I have a 10mm and 12mm on my right side and a 12mm on my left. I will trigger on Saturday [which will bring all to about 16mm and 18mm) and my IUI will be Monday. My RE seemed to think the 10mm might not be ready, which confuses me....isn't 16mm good? Also, my lining was 6.5. (which is better than last cycle)

My husband is very optimistic. I maybe went in wanting more than I got; which sucks as I wanted to cry when I didn't hear "you have 5 x 18mm follies". I'm so unrealistic. What a weirdo. & being on Femara I know I am not going to get those results. I did that last time and set myself up for an emotional crash. But, I did have one more good follie this time and a bunch of small ones - in which last time, I only had 2, period. So I am happy with this. Jay is very, very optimistic - and I need that; he's so wonderful.

Here we go!

Here's an update, as promised. I am writing from my bed. it's official, I have the flu. I haven't felt this horrible in years. I hope the meds kick this so I can feel better...I way more exciting things to focus on.

My RE called me back this morning and I am to start Femara 3 per day (7.5) cd 3-7. My ultrasound is scheduled for 4/21. I'm going to order my trigger today and spend this weekend deciding if the donor sperm we choose last time really, really is the one we want. This is such a huge, huge decision; really nerve racking. I read so many horror stories of low sperm counts. Ours was 14mil last time, and I was fine with that, but apparantly most consider that low. I wished they came with more than a 10mil guarantee.

I am so excited. I got my "Baby Bryant" journal and folder I was keeping everything in from our 1st go around and saw the pages and pages of names I had "narrowed" it down too. Ha! Silly, I know...but I have to say that 7 pages out of the 15 books I had checked out at the local library, isn't.bad.at.all.

Let the fun begin!

happy news!

good morning, friends. AF arrived this morning! eek! i was hoping another week but i was over that in about two-seconds when my eyes filled with tears and realized after months of waiting, we can try again for our precious little one.

i am going to call the Dr. as soon as 8:30 rolls around and will report back.

any cycle buddies?

i just realized something.

that we have been married for nine years.
nine years
and still don't have babies.
i am so thankful we finally found an RE that we love and are on our 2nd journey to fight this madness to have a precious bundle of cuteness.

thinking of the years that have passed - i am kind of upset that we didn't pursue treatments in 2005 after we found out hubby had no fishies. i haven't told many people this, but Jay wanted to wait to test again, due the finality of the results. he is a man; he is supposed to bear children - these were his thoughts. then we found out about the exploratory retrieval surgeries that could be done; and he just waited. and waited. and waited to give me an answer. finally, after 3 years - he said no. i was never upset at him. never. just the amount of time that had passed. we have lost so much time. i am so thankful we are back to this point.

everything is going good. we are waiting for my cycle to start, which i hope isn't until the end of next week - just to make sure Metformin is back in the game. i'm over the tummy aches, thankfully.

i found out that my RE can store the donor sperm, but it is $400/month. so, that isn't a cost savings. we are still up in the air about our decision to stay with the same donor or choose from the lab in VA; is $90 in savings worth changing our minds on a donor we were really, really happy with?

we've spilt the beans about trying again...but only to a few - our parents, bf's, and a few co-workers. they are of course excited. i am reading alot on IUIs. I know there are lots of "things to try/do" during a infertility journey; if i can do anything that will help with this 2nd IUI; i am on it!

spermies on the mind.

We have began our donor search again. First of all, I am totally stressing that we can only order donor sperm, one cycle at a time. In budget terms, that is a whopping $246 shipping cost, per cycle. After 3 cycles (if needed) that would pay for a 4th IUI cycle. This doesn't sit well with me. I remember my RE saying at one point they could store for up to 6 weeks. When I called Thursday I wasn't told this. I will question again.

I fell in love with our donor we chose the first cycle. He had physcial features of both Jay and I, had a wonderful family history - health, mental, education, and had successful pregnancies reported. We may go with the same donor, after all it was probably 99.7% more my body's fault for the BFN than the donor, but we continue to look. Jay is always in good spirits and is never anything but positive and supportive; I know this must be so difficult for him. I'm blessed with such a wonderful husband.

Our new beginning....

Because it took me just shy of a year to try this again, I removed all previous posts of our first IUI journey. So, sorry if it's a little empty around here. After loosing the 4 y.o. foster child we were hours away from the start of the adoption process to our first official BFN; I had a really ruff year. Last night, I finally packed the final pictures of our foster children and put them away. I spent sometime with God afterwards and prayed for strength and courage to move forward.

Diagnoses:

Her: PCOS  Him: Male Factor Infertility

How we got here:

After 2 years of dating, Jay & I married in 2001. We knew we wanted children and started trying right away. By 2005, there were no babies. I made our first appointment with a local Fertility Specialist in the spring of 2005. Jay kindly donated a sperm sample and I went through a lovely physical exam. It was confirmed that I had Polycystic Ovaries (PCOS) and I was placed on Metformin. I was also given Provera to induce a cycle as well as Clomid, to start on cycle day 4. A few days passed and we received a call stating Jay's sperm count was negative; confused, I stopped Provera. Thinking the results were incorrect, we requested to be tested again through our PCP. Sadly, the test results came back the same.

Jay was devastated; I was confused. This is where our journey began. In 2007, we made the decision to become foster parents and was blessed with several precious children. During this time, having the luxury of staying at home, I consumed myself with research on infertility and PCOS. We had been told of several sperm exploratory and retrieval surgeries for Jay. The goal would be to hopefully retrieve sperm, if indeed there were blockages, then proceed with IVF. This procedure in addition to the In-Vitro, was insanely expensive; neither of which our insurance covered; I also understood his views on the sense of finality he would feel, in the event of unsucessful retrievals. We researched embryo adoption; this is the direction I wanted to purse, as both the egg and sperm would be adopted. We were then introduced to sperm donation and Interuterine Insemination (IUI). I allowed Jay to make this decision, since donor sperm would be involved; after months of prayer and discussion, we decided to begin our IUI journey.

In September 2008 our darling foster children were reunited with birth family, one day before the adoption process was to begin. Our hearts were shattered; our hands tied. In July 2009, we made our first appointment with our new RE, who had came highly recommended. Actually, during this time, my neighbor was currently pregnant with triplets, after a 5th successful IUI and drug therapy.

July 21, 2009: Our first appointment was scheduled with a different Fertility Specialist than we first saw in 2005. It was confirmed that with a sperm count of zero, exploratory surgery wouldn't even be considered. Fortunately, we had earlier decided the direction we wanted to pursue and had identified the perfect donor. My Metformin was increased and I was to start Femara on cycle days 3-7.

July 25, 2009: Cycle day 1

July 27, 2009: Started Femara thru Cycle day 7.

August 13, 2009: Cycle day 16 ultrasound - 2 follies, 14 & 16; Trigger Shot in evening

August 16, 2009: Our first IUI

September 2, 2009: Beta - Negative; Started new cycle early AM.

Our second cycle was to begin in September, however an uncooperative work schedule interrupted the cycle day 16 ultrasound; so this month was not successful. At this time, we decided to wait until after the holidays and start again after the new year.

April 1, 2010: Anxiously awaiting my cycle to begin to proceed with our 2nd IUI. Restarted Metformin; 1500mg.